.... wannabe

Alright, so I admit it!  I may determine that I am just not cut out for blogging.  But, I have a very good friend who says she's taking up running - I had to do *something*!  Zero to 5K in something like 6 weeks.  I tried that once.  I ran - - - less than a mile.  I want to be able to say I'm a runner - and I'll leave that option open for now, but for the time being, I have very little opportunity for exercise in my schedule.  The best time to squeeze in some "me time" is well, about now, after 8pm.  Who wants to exercise after they've already had dinner and put the kids to bed?  Not me, says I.  No, I'm pooped. 

So, I'm going to take up blogging! 

I wanna be smart.... I wanna be real.... I wanna live for today... I wanna be a good mom.... I wanna be a good wife.... I wanna be a good daughter....  I wanna be a good example to others, sharing my Christian faith & values... I don't wanna be rushed.  I wanna recognize what is right in front of me is fantastic .... just like Shauna Niequist does, author of Cold Tangerines.

She says in the book, Cold Tangerines, as she was explaining all of the things she thought she would become, she thought she was on the verge of becoming who she's always wanted to be until she realizes this: 

"But this is what I’m finding, in glimpses and flashes: this is it. This is it, in the best possible way. That thing I’m waiting for, that adventure, that move-score-worthy experience unfolding gracefully. This is it. Normal, daily life ticking by on our streets and sidewalks, in our houses and apartments, in our beds and at our dinner tables, in our dreams and prayers and fights and secrets – this pedestrian life is the most precious thing any of use will ever experience."


Another favorite quote in her book is this:
 
"I want a life that sizzles and pops and makes me laugh out loud. And I don't want to get to the end, or to tomorrow, even, and realize that my life is a collection of meetings and pop cans and errands and receipts and dirty dishes. I want to eat cold tangerines and sing out loud in the car with the windows open and wear pink shoes and stay up all night laughing and paint my walls the exact color of the sky right now. I want to sleep hard on clean white sheets and throw parties and eat ripe tomatoes and read books so good they make me jump up and down, and I want my everyday to make God belly laugh, glad that he gave life to someone who loves the gift."



So, I wanna be like that.  I wanna recognize my daily encounters with life, my kids, my husband, my parents, my coworkers, my friends, every single one, for what it is.  How God is working in my life, entangled amidst the chaos of first-grade sagas, gymnastics, potty training, hurried suppers, forgotten forks when packing A's school lunch, teaching, working, learning, discussing, and every thing else.  I wanna be here.